People who trigger you aren't worth your time.

I am sick to death of taking 5 steps forward & 15 steps back because of her. I should have never gone back, I should have left her in my past after she destroyed me the first time & showed me her "true colors" but no, I was a soft arse & I "apologised" for suffering PND, when really, she was the one who sent me over the edge with the constant harrassment from her mates! she was the one who treat me badly & then played the victim. she made me believe she was my best friend, & then she ran off with all my friends that had dumped me just because i'd had a baby! she's the one that was so desparate for friends that she hooked up with mine after they discarded of me! Well, I got to sit & feel smug when months later, they all dumped her because she never shuts up about her health. 

SERIOUSLY.... 

She thinks the world evolves around her, she's a spoilt, sefish & ungrateful brat who's had her parents wipe her arse all her life, so now she acts like she fell out of the queens vagina & somehow, she thinks she's better than everyone else! but how can she be? her life is pathetic. she spends her days sleeping because she's been awake all night playing pubg, & then she blames her health as to why she's tired all the time, but it's utter bullshit, she's just a lazy slob. I lived with her for the best part of 6 months when we were in college, then when I wanted to go back home because i'd had enough of being someones carer when i'm disabled myself, she tried to manipulate me & make me feel bad so that I would stay & she didnt have to go back to her mum looking after her because she's too chicken shit to live alone. 

she's fucking poisonous!! she slags her family own off, the people that have given up THEIR lives to look after her dumb arse & give her a life! she mostly slates her mum, & her sister on her parenting skills every now & then, which makes me laugh because it's not like she will ever experience what its like to bring up a child, & I don't mean because of her health either, I mean because no man on this earth would ever tie himself to her for the rest of his goddamn life & give her a child! 

the only male friend she does have lives in America, she's never met him, & EVEN HE gets so sick of her drama & bullshit that he mutes her for days/weeks at a time on Twitter. it's quite hilarious how possesive she gets over it actually & she sits there saying she doesnt have feelings for him or anything like that - well if thats the case, then maybe she's just a bunny boiling, single white female!!! Honestly, she's soul destroying & I have no clue how her family or anyone copes with her?? sod that, if I was her mum, i'd stick her in a fucking care home & wash my hands of the poisonous wench! 

See, thats the thing with self-obsessed people. they are so busy thinking about how shit their life is, that they can't see past their own eyeballs to help anyone else! & yet.. they still won't think twice about taking up all of your time & energy when they need some attention!

It has taken a long time (years) but i'm finally seeing what I should have seen the day I met her all those years ago! That she isn't a nice person, she isn't an inspiration to anyone! she's a desparate little cling on that will suck the life out of anyone that gives her an inch! she's insane & I can't WAIT for Karma to hit her hard, because when her deluded little bubble finally pops & she comes back down to reality, she isn't going to have anyone left, & she's going to wish she had been a nicer person, & not the posessive, manipulative, narcasist, two faced little bellend that she is.

I am sick of putting myself back together because of her..... 

Let her carry on believing the bullshit stories she tells herself in her head because of her GINORMOUS ARSEHOLE DISORDER! Let her be alone, because that is exactly how she is going to end up!

I am SO done with her. I deserve SO MUCH better! I have spent years building myself back up & nobody will ever destroy my inner peace ever again! especially not her! 

because she isnt worth it, she never fucking was.